Online Singles Dating

Let's face it, girls: Being a single lesbian can be tough, particularly if you don't live in a major urban center. As Tracey Stevens, co-author of 'How to Be a Happy Lesbian: A Coming Out Guide' says, "Since LGBT people make up around ten to twenty percent of the population, it can be slim pickings as far as finding to meet someone to date or even be friends with. If you consider that many of us do not live in areas where being LGBT is fairly accepted, it makes meeting someone really difficult." But the task of finding new love is not as impossible as it might seem at first, especially if you know where to look.

Find the Community
One of the surest ways to meet other old lesbians is through organizations and events tailored to the gay and lesbian community. If you're newly single, recently moved, or have just come out, however, you might be a loss at how to access these. Luckily, there are some excellent resources to help you find out what's available in your town. Brad Becker is the Executive Director of the GLBT National Help Center, which houses the largest LGBT resource database in the country. He says, "People will often say, 'There's nothing in my area,' when there are resources just one town away."

With over 15,000 resources listed, the GLBT National Hotline (1-888-843-4564) is a great resource, or, if you're under 25, try the GLBT National Youth Talk Line (1-800-246-PRIDE). Or access its website at www.GLBTnationalhelpcenter.org to learn about the different community centers, social dating singles groups, sport organizations, religious groups, gay newspapers, etc. in your area. The hotlines also offer answers to factual questions about GLBT issues as well as peer counseling, in which you can talk to a volunteer about coming-out issues, relationship concerns, safer-sex information, and much more.

Get Centered
So with these dating personals resources at your disposal, where do you start? Becker recommends checking out your local community center, if you have one. He says, "Often community centers are home to many different groups, programs and events that take place at the same location each month. It's an excellent way of finding out about different options under one roof."

The National Association of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Community Centers (www.lgbtcenters.org/) can also help you find out if there's a community center in your area. Becker also suggests looking for gay and old lesbians social organizations with a theme that suits your interest -- think book clubs, political organizations, singing groups, hiking clubs, etc. He says, "It's easier for people to meet and talk with each other.

Everyone's there because of some shared common interest beyond sexual orientation, so you can strike up conversations much more easily." If you have a local gay paper, it may list these clubs and specific events weekly or monthly, and you can search online at the GLBT National Help Center and elsewhere. Kathy Wunder, LPC, also co-author of How to Be a Happy Lesbian, says, "The online dating singles resources are major. Before the Internet it was a hit or miss proposition. Now you can just do a search for 'lesbian' and the name of your city, geographic areas, etc., and come up with a huge list of groups."

Find Your Faith
Though it may sound old-fashioned, another excellent place for you to meet other lesbians is at church. Carrie, 29, says, "My faith is important to me, so when I moved to Washington State, I looked for a gay-friendly church. I met other gays and lesbians dating personals there, and it was through one of them that I met my girlfriend.

You can find listings of gay-friendly churches through the GLBT National Help Center or at www.gaychurch.org. The online dating gay-friendly Metropolitan Community Church also has 300 affiliated churches worldwide.

Get Moving
Stevens and Wunder recommend joining a local sports team. It may sound stereotypical, but a lot of lesbians do love sports, and volleyball, soccer, basketball, and softball teams, tennis and golf leagues, and other sports clubs tend to attract athletic women online of all shapes and sizes. Stevens offers one caution, though, "Of course not all of them are gay, so have your gay-dar on full power before you approach your favorite female jock."

source : personals.aol.com
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